I’m a big breasted woman.
All my life I have had to endure comments about my breasts from stupid men. When I was in college, there was a guy who would say as I walked into class three times a week, “How are they, Ms. Holley?” Finally, one day I got up the courage to tell him how much his comments embarrassed me. He was actually surprised and told me he thought he was complimenting me. This was in the 70’s. Are guys any different now? Can they see above your chest? My friend John says nothing has changed and that most men are pigs.
The other day I volunteered to take care of a man who is pretty ill. I don’t know what planet he arrived from, but he couldn’t even make eye contact with me. He must be from a far off titillating galaxy because his eyes are always fixated on my breasts; it’s as if I don’t have a face. Maybe I should buy a bra that has two masks of famous people and start a ventriloquist act. At least then we could have a conversation.
Okay, so the question is, how big are those breasts anyway? Well, they are about a 42 double D, ample but not of the Jane Mansfield vintage. Not to say that I envy her or that I would compare, but I do realize in the mammary hall of fame, few could out muster some of the past greats.
I took a woman lover thinking she might know how to treat my kahunas. You would think that a girl, having breasts, would know what a breast would want. Well, it is true, if you have them and understand them, there is a likely chance you can sympathize with them, and touch them as they would be touched. This however was not the case. Her breasts were not as big as mine and so the simpatico feature could not be figured in, and frankly, no matter how hard she tried, she was at a loss to muster up passion for them. However, the relationship prospered so long as I could appreciate standing face to face with someone who would also notice the shape or color of my eyes.
Here’s some real news: Not everybody likes big breasts. So small-breasted women, rely on what really counts. My friend John says it’s realness and that can come in any package.